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Stealing a kiss to redirect a habit

Natalie Sisson is guiding us with clarity through the 15 Days to Freedom Blog Challenge. Day 5 is about habits and surrounding ourselves with inspiring people.

I have heard the formula about the 66 days to form a new habit once or twice before. Although I have mainly used the model of 21 and 30 days in the past. And wondered why the new habit has not stuck!

So I first commit to using this as my new measure.

I have been using the model written about in Expectation Hangover, for weeding out and replanting that which is more aligned to my heart’s desire for a while now. Here is an overview – you have 3 columns with the headings

Remove, Modify and Add.

I do this at the start of each week and write one thing in each column. It is simple, highly effective and not overwhelming.

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit” Aristotle

I have been surrounding myself with more inspiring people in the past 12 months. Leaving my home country 3 years ago to set up life on the other side of the world at 50 years old, requires many changes and reassessments. Although uncomfortable at times, it has also helped me to shake of some outdated ways of being in the world, that no longer serve me. I have also had difficult yet transforming conversations with some who have been in my life a long time and well seem to suck the life and light out of me. And using a tool called Perception Checking has helped with achieving deeper and richer understanding with many people.

Last year I made a worthwhile investment in myself, with life coaching. My coach Christine Hassler is a speaker, author and inspirational leader. I choose her because I wanted to work with someone that is truly walking her talk and prepared to be vulnerable and share the good, the bad, the ugly. I no longer want to hold anyone on a pedestal, because often it comes from a place of thinking ‘I am less than’ and I also do not want to think ‘I am better than’. Comparisons stop action. Following others that are leading the way is a smart move, it helps navigate the bumps and pitfalls along the path. I have also found that creating a team of cheerleaders is vital. I have never been the type to sit around with friends and talk about our Woe Poor Me Stories or Bitch about others, this is a slippery path indeed, and I have noticed how some need to ‘win’ the saddest/worst story each time. Living my life from not wanting to be a gossip or emotional dumper has sometimes not won me friends, but has helped me not to get caught up in others dramas. This is a blessing. I am also extending my Cheerleader Team continuously and would like to add a Mastermind Group and a Positive Playful People Team also to my life. Because all work and no play makes Lulu no fun at all!

I am at a place of stepping into a new ME that is ready to emerge. My husband and I work from home, whilst this gives us many freedoms, especially intimate interludes during the day, or a power siesta, it sometimes is frustrating when we want to stay in the zone. I like the 25/5 technique. Focus for 25 minutes then have a 5 minute break. And stealing a kiss is top on the list, even after 24 years of marriage. Then dancing. Then walking out in my garden.

“The final forming of a person’s character lies in their own hands” Anne Frank

Lulu Trevena                                    January 19th 2015